11. Know Who Are You Today - Wife / Mother ?

Read sequel post, Have you played fight fight in the name of parenting?

We as new parent passed the most stressing time with flying colors while i trained the nonchalant better half to no avail. I am trying though. Now, let’s take a dive into why makes these fights were so irresistible then?

I hope, I can use the past tense now. You can see, there are three person in real world, you, him and baby, right?

L to R : Father, Happy Baby and all purpose dwarf Joker - Mother
I will say no. There are actually five. 

Expectation : A Sweet Wife who is supposed to blossom as a Natural Mother. And a Caring Husband who is always looked upon as an Awesome Father plus a cute baby. 

Just slap yourself, if you believe in this greatest utopic myth of life. There are five members, let me introduce them to you. 

Reality      : The Missing Wife who is feeling nothing more than a Biological Mother. A Confused Husband who don’t know what to do in case of emergency and get titled as Struggling Father and the little baby boss. 

The constant conflict between the four very different persons living together in the same roof, Wife-Father-Mother-Husband results in the in-house soap opera at full volume. Next time, while you are expecting your husband to say something to you, might just hear a doting father  and vice-versa.

See, how motherhood can widen thinking horizons, only after my derriere.

Three top learning from my kitty:  

1- Escape the battleground and meet your lost wife/husband in a coffee shop, away from the chaos and never ending demanding list of parenthood, mother/father tags.

2- Accept that whatever said and done, the prime responsibility of raising a child lies with a woman, still. Education, socio-economic status all crap, this notion is deep seated in our culture and gender roles. 

3- You have been a perfectionist at work and instant gratification by e-mails, performance appraisals and likes gives you a kick. Then dear now is the time to do the most important duty of your life and learn humility, sacrifice and tolerance. 

Kuch jyaada ho gaya ;p

To be continued...

PS : Watch my fav. song from alphabet K- Kholo Kholo Darwaje Parde Karo Kinare.

Read my other posts from alphabet K

1- Kanyakumari  (Travel)

This post is written for April A to Z Challenge 2014, serial number 402.  


  1. Well, that's a good tip to meet the husband away from infant and to be seen (or glimpsed) for the woman she is. We all have roles and personas and masks, but sadly the essential woman gets overlooked. We all play wife, mother, lover, friend .. but WE need to remember that we are still so much more. (Husbands are NOT good at listening - I think their ears get blocked by wax when they become parents).

    1. Hahahha, thats a creative way of saying, Deaf Mamma weds Deaf Papa ;p

  2. Expectation and Reality will always be different, in every sphere of life :p

    1. Hmmmm...without a smiley. Go get married da !