27/01/2014

Har Ghar Kuch Kehta Hai...Part 1

Related Post : Har Ghar Kuch Kehta Hai - Part 2

I thought of writing on this post while watching Juno, a scene having a conversation between a young couple/first-time-to-be-parents :

    Vanessa (staring at a blank wall with a tester patch): Okay. So we have... custard and cheesecake.
    Mark (almost color blindly): They're yellow.
    Vanessa: Right, well I wanted to pick something that was gender neutral until we get the baby and then we can just... add a more decisive pallete.
    Mark: Why does everybody think that yellow is gender-neutral? I-I don't know any guy with a yellow bedroom.
    Vanessa: It's a baby... I'm thinking more custard. Just with this light... I don't know maybe I should just paint a larger swatch or just try it on another wall...
    Mark: I think it's too early to paint. That's my opinion.
    Vanessa: I disagree.
    Vanessa: This wall is gonna need something. Mhm, our first family photo right in the middle. Right up there. Can you see it?


    *Names are changed for confidentiality ;p
      But the advert below on youtube.com was the cherry on the cake. It sat in my heart while i was playing chu chu tv rhymes for our lil one.

As if someone is prying in our bedroom and made a shot out of it. I couldn't resist but embed this video in the post. Its just bang on especially the sound of keyboard in the background and "hmmm kharcha plan karna important hai". So very real. 

In one way, i am relived that i am not the only victim but merely one among millions of women who are left alone to love this tyranny. 

I have always run the show on my own when it comes to doing up our home. After selecting the movers and packers and done with negotiations, sinhaji will leave the house and everything inside at my disposal from a stapler pin to white goods to our certificates to anything we own. So, in case you happen to ask him, if at all, how open is he for relocation, his answer would be a quick yes "why not depends on profile of the work". He can always outsource such tiring task to his assistant. 

More over, I have never let the feeling of merely a tenant stop me from drilling in the white wash walls and hanging our happy memories or pasting lungta (tibetan prayer flag) or chinese lights. Anyways on moving out, the owner will take away one month's rent so why play hide and seek with the clock only. With moving out in own home sweet home, the interior designer in me is prodding me every single day and dying to come out in full form but to no avail. 

Only a woman can relate how she can have an infatuation with a piece of furniture, embroidered cushion cover, blue color pottery, floral motif table cloth, drapery fabric, terracotta artifacts for balcony garden, walnut color chest drawer, photo frames, flower vase, scented candles, door hangings, antique letter boxes,  ... the list is endless actually.



May be not infatuation, a woman goes through all the stages of love when its come to her 'home sweet home'. Saat mukaam hote hain ishq mein...dilkashi (attraction), uns (infatuation), mohabbat (love), aqeedat (reverence), ibaadat (worship), junoon (obsession) aur maut (death) ! Did i tell you how much i enjoyed watching Ishqiya and its sher-o-shayari. Marvellous job Abhishek Chaubey. 

Visiting handicrafts melas, @home, home stop, home centre, good earth, mother earth, fab india, bombay store have been a part of our courtship period and we have continued the trend even after marriage. Regardless of how much my better half loathe going to such stores, he has come to terms with the fact that by allowing me to have such visual treats and appetizers he can actually buy some peace of mind back home while glued to TV.

You my darling woman species, tell me...

What wrong am in doing if i am taking him for a stroll through all the sections of a lifestyle home store, i am just promoting rural artisan given my NGO background and there is no other way, that i can push him to the gym or for an evening walk. So while whatever futile activity he might think it is, i am just being myself, a caring loving wife who cares for your health even on a outing. Wink wink.

Its not that, i haven't given it a thought that why someone can place functionality over beautifying things even if it means not allowing to fluid yourself on the couch and hanging boots after a tiring day on the coffee table, because ouch ! the silk thread flowers bura maan jayenge.

Like in my earlier post too, i have shared how much humility it demanded out of me to accept such facts after marriage. Or is it hostel life alters the DNA of male species and let them rise above the materialism of home decor. He will never understand why would i like to buy a mask of a Masaai tribe  or one from Sikkim or net sheer curtains because they are as good as none. Now, i have stopped asking, aapko kuch different lag raha hai kya, after giving artistic touch to our home. May be its beyond hostel life, its a way we are wired in our heads.

We both are Fountainhead-ed, he being Howard Roark - who just love things as they are as absolute without any furnishing. And me, loosely like Peter Keating senselessly creative.

Nevertheless, one of my resolution is to not visit a handicraft mela and let simplistic zen type living take control of my life.

But what to do, my senses are lost as i pass by a lifestyle store or read about an upcoming mela. Because my Roark will never cherish the ornate value of a handicraft. Darling, its time for payback even if its four times priced than the original, we should brush it off saying we are creating a eco-friendly sustainable value chain. To join the fad is the organic tag, anything to do with it will ask for Gandhi Ji on not less than a denomination of 500. We all know its a little overpriced or sometime overly over priced but saving traditional rural craftsmanship over the imported cheeni maal with no roots makes me a good valued customer, sometimes if not always.

Let's accept one thing.

As an Indian, we have a fixation for anything made or brought from foreign country be it anything.  Anything being portrayed over the top to make us believe its made in US and UK and on for sale in India...trust me, it has not traveled beyond China. One leg of any retail giant lies in the jaws of the wide mouthed dragon. This I had learned from one of my friend working in merchandising vertical of a top retail company, now ruling the roost in Mumbai . When she shared how they set pricing of clothing or premium food or lifestyle item  like 499, 999, 1599, 2999, i felt like being robbed with consent.

For your ease, please imagine the scene from the movie Guru, when the protagonist, Guru Kant Desai goes to sell kela silk in the Bombay open market. You haven't seen it, then recall a scene from hatt bazar where two competitors selling same product calmouring at their loudest ...10 ke 2, 10 ke 2, 10 ke 2. If you haven't seen even a hatt (not Delhi Hatt), you please first get a hold of middle classism and its  nuances, take a break from office, visit a village. Darling you are missing out on the real pleasures of being an Indian.

Anyways, i think i should tag this post under home decor because there will be many more coming often. Let the home decor rest in peace and so is Roark's golden silence as penchant for the riot of colors is only growing up on me each passing day. Oh ! how much he wish he hadn't bought a home and have this mahabharat over home decor each passing day. 

Let me dedicate this song for his ever humming nod on anything to do with aesthetics :

Aap Ki Aankhon Mein Kuch Maheke Hue Se Raaz Hai,
Aap Se Bhi Khoobsurat Aap Ke Andaaz Hai,

Aap Ki Aankhon Mein Kya Saahil Bhi Milte Hai Kahin,
Aap Ki Khaamoshiyaan Bhi Aap Ki Aawaaz Hai.


*Video sourced from You Tube

Related Post : Har Ghar Kuch Kehta Hai - Part 2

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